The World Cup Group of Death: Drogba the Reaper

December 4th, 2009 | by: Elliott |

The African Cup of Nations and World Cup draws have both ended. And I take from these events one unalterable and eternal truth: Didier Drogba is death.

Allow me to make my case.

In 2006, the Ivory Coast was drawn with Serbia, Argentina, and the Netherlands. Argentina had been knocked out of the 2002 World Cup in the first round, the Dutch implode like clockwork, and Serbia was, and is, Serbia. So what made that group so menacing? Was it Roman Riquelme’s footspeed? Nemanja Vidic’s footskills? Marco Van Basten’s charming personality? No. It was one man. Didier Drogba.

The African Cup of Nations pot 1 group, with Egypt and Camaroon, would be a difficult group…but for Drogba’s ominous presence. Now all shudder for fear of the mask of the red death. And the World Cup 2010? Group G? G stands for grisly demise. The North Korean Republic may not make your knees tremble, but neither Portugal nor Brazil wanted to cross swords with the Coite d’Voire. Why? Surely Carvahlo and Alex have some tips and tricks on stopping Didier from Chelsea training sessions.

But there is only one way to stop Didier: die. Die slowly. Die painfully. Die…mercilessly.

Now I am a lover of alliteration, so Drogba tickles my fancy in that regard. But he also does play football. And play it quite well. In many ways, Drogba’s game reflects all of societies’ preoccupations and fascination with death. He attacks in many forms…

You thought you’d see your own demise a mile away? Didier Drogba is not opposed to throwing hand grenades from afar, all the better to surprise you.

I’m sorry – did you think you were smarter than death? Didier Drogba is no fool – at times, he will out think you.

I’m sorry, did you think you could outmuscle death? Drogba leaps into danger with little to fear.

I know your retort – Drogba does dive. But what happens when Drogba the shadow on the ground picks himself up, sharpens his scythe, and the fire in his eyes burns into your very soul?

The Ivory Coast is a fine side, with the Toures locking down the defense and Kalou making neat cameo appearences. But only one player haunts central defender’s dreams. Only one player, in the blink of an eye, can cause the demise of two years of World Cup qualifying.

Sleep tight Carvahlo. Sleep tight, Alex. Drogba is watching you train every single day…and only he knows the contents of the last chapter of your storied careers.

Cote d’Ivoire World Cup Team Blog RSS Feed

sossef

CIV is my #1 team in W2010, but let’s keep our feet on the ground !
nwjake

Great post, very entertaining! I’m already looking forward to the CIV-Brazil match! That and England-USA…
Coconut

Fantastic post! and you’re spot on!

Viva Didier “La Muerte” Drogba!
manby

thats bollocks
Joao Fernandes

I believe that a team has to have 10 more players
We also have Ronaldo and … it was a misery in the national team…
http://ivorycoast.worldcupblog.org Elliott

I definitely agree that soccer is a sport of 11 players, but Drogba is certainly one of world footy’s biggest stars and could make a big splash. His individual brilliance could cover for at least, say, 2 defensive blunders a game.
Seth

Portugal
Argentina
Ivory Coast
Spain

Those are the teams I’m supporting…

You guys are my fav. African team and it sucks really, really bad that you’re put in another group of death. Ivory Coast has a ton of potential to go far, but I guess luck is not on their side. This time, however, you guys face my team (Portugal), and it would be a shame if these two teams did not make it past the group phases. Let us hope that we can both upset Brazil

see you in june!
http://ivorycoast.worldcupblog.org Elliott

The draw was definitely not lucky, but I am too bright eyed and bushy-tailed an optimist – this is a “group of death” precisely because the Ivory Coast is a good team. If they were a bad team, then this would be Brazil and Portugal Plus Two.

But yeah, I am trying to create a new phrase “Killer’s Row” to replace the group of death moniker. Who’s on board?
Neto

“Group of death” was created because Portugal barely made it. There is no question that Ivory Coast is great, and Brazil is just, well, Brazil. Portugal came in as an underdog (because of their qual.) and now we have the history of qualifiers erased so to speak, and I can’t wait to see what will happen.
D

‘Group of Death’, Ivory coast, Bazil,Portugal. These 3 teams have the potential players in this group. The Ivory Coast is the team that will defeat the biggest challange in this goup, for several reasons. They want to represent the African continent at this competition, they have grown in maturity after the 2006 wolrd cup, they have top players… They will play like hell in this group to save the image of the continent.
Brazil should be very careful…
Mac

DROGBA— THE MAN, THE GREATEST, THE BEST!!!!!!!!!

-Cote D’Ivorie for World Cup 2010
KENNEDY

Hey,Drogba is the man that the all world would want to watch in 2010 world cup. He has done it several times for his country and he continues to make africa proud as a whole without any doubt.I am from Zambia and am supporting

IVORY COST
SPAIN
BRAIL
Ghana